I think I want to choose adoption, now what?

Are you considering adoption? You may not know where to begin. Do you find a family yourself? Do you talk to an adoption attorney? Do you call an adoption agency? These are normal questions to consider. Adoption is a very loving choice for your child, which means it is one that needs to be done carefully. You need and deserve someone to walk you through the process. It is important for you to consider the differences between using an adoption attorney, facilitator/matchmaker, or a local licensed agency.

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Questions you will want to consider and maybe ask the attorney, facilitator, family, or agencies you speak to:

  • Will I have an advocate/ spokesperson that is committed to me and my desires or will the same person represent me and the adoptive family?
  • Will that advocate be a local person that I can meet with face to face or someone in another state that I can only have phone contact with?
  • Will I receive guidance to help me think through what I desire in a family, how I want the hospital time to look, and what level of openness I want?
  • If I need and/or desire grief counseling before or after the adoption, is it available to me free of charge?
  • Have the adoptive parents received training to understand my desires and my emotions?
  • Will anyone help hold the adoptive family accountable for the level of openness we agree on?
  • Will we sign an openness agreement together?
  • What happens if I change my mind at some point during the process?

If any of these things are important to you, it’s important to know that choosing a local agency, like Lifeline, is in your best interest as the expectant parent. Attorneys are typically hired by adoptive families and many times do not consider the needs of the expectant parent. Other agencies or online facilitators may only desire to “match make” without considering your important questions, desires, or emotional needs.

Lifeline desires to care for you holistically as a whole woman, not just a woman who is pregnant. At Lifeline, you are in the driver’s seat, having a voice in every part of the way from choosing an adoptive family, to determining the level of openness in your adoption, and more.

All of our families know our biggest desire is to serve the expectant parent through this tough choice and our families desire that for you. Our families have been trained on what you are experiencing and feeling and value that you receive the services you deserve. At Lifeline, you will be assigned a counselor who is dedicated to listening to you and advocating for your needs and your dreams for both you and your child. Your counselor will talk with you and meet with you regularly. Instead of a transaction, Lifeline desires to give you support continually in a relationship with your counselor, for as long as you desire it. This long-term support begins during your pregnancy and continues after in order to provide or connect you to resources to care for you emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

We want you to know that you are not alone. Lifeline desires to walk this journey alongside you. Even if you ultimately do not choose adoption, your final decision will be accepted without pressure. Whatever plan you choose, we are committed to you as a loving support and seek to empower you in making the best decisions for you and your child.

If you think an adoption agency that puts the birthparent first is an option you’d like to consider, please contact us 24/7 to talk to one of our pregnancy counselors. You can reach us at  1-800-875-5595 or e-mail at pregnant@lifelinechild.org.

 

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