When I first mentioned the word “adoption” to my 23-year-old friend, I could see the pain on her face. She was hurt and angry. After all, how could strangers give her precious son a better life than she could? Didn’t I know how much she loved her baby?
Although she was walking through an unplanned pregnancy, I knew that she loved her son, and I knew how serious she was about sacrificially caring for him to give him everything in the world that he wanted or needed. Her obvious love for her child is why I thought she might be brave enough to consider the option of adoption. I wanted her to see that this option could be more than just a good thing for her son, but also how adoption could bring hope for her own life. She could start her career, meet the right guy, and pursue her dreams. Parenting her son would give her a new set of dreams, but I wanted her to consider an option that would be healthy and good for her but also allow her the freedom to love her son well.
I explained to her that I understood her hesitations. Adoption, to some, sounds like a last resort option. To me, it is beautiful, sacrificial, and so very brave. I shared with her that I was adopted as a baby into the most amazing family and so I know, first-hand, that adoption can be redemptive to a birth mom, a child, and a couple struggling with infertility.
I was so happy that my friend allowed me to walk her through what is true about making an adoption plan. I explained to her that she would get to pick the family, and even meet multiple families if she was not sure who the best fit was for her child. She would be able to have a say as to whether or not her child would grow up in a big city or in the fresh air of the country. She would get to decide what her role would look like in her child’s life – would she love her son from afar or would she have visits with him? She would be in the driver’s seat in making an adoption plan that would provide a fresh start for her life, her son’s life, and for a family who has prepared for a child and waited for their hopes to come true.
A good mother makes a plan for her child’s life.
I am thankful that my friend decided to reach out to talk to a pregnancy counselor. She may decide to parent or she may choose an amazing family for her child. I do not know what the end of her story will be, but I do know that she is being a good mother already by considering every option for her precious son, and I am so proud of her.
Lifeline Pregnancy Counselors are here for you. Our counselors will help you understand your options and equip you to make the best possible choice. We want you to find peace and comfort in a plan that is right for you during this uncertain time. Contact us today to set up a time to speak with a counselor who can help you on this journey.
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